We’re excited to bring you another enlightening episode of the Dr. Sev Talks Money podcast!
This time, we’re delving into the delicate and often overlooked subject of financial trauma with Stephanie Olano; a Certified Financial Therapist, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and the visionary CEO of Awkward Money.
In this candid conversation, Stephanie reveals how trauma-informed coaching combined with financial education can help break deep-rooted money cycles, especially within Latinx and communities of color. Some key takeaways:
*Building financial resilience involves creating a sense of control and security while aligning financial goals with personal values.
*Understanding your money story and emotional triggers can lead to more effective financial planning and greater
peace of mind.
*Financial trauma often stems from childhood experiences like money scarcity and leads to adult financial anxiety and shame.
*Trauma-informed coaching helps by recognizing these psychological and emotional barriers.
Whether you’re looking to heal lingering money wounds,
understand your spending triggers, or simply want practical tips for fostering better financial well-being, this episode is packed with insights you won’t want to miss. Tune in for an empowering dialogue that might just change the way you think about money. Forever!
Dive deeper into the conversation about financial wellness and overcoming financial trauma.
Let’s make personal finance, financial trauma, and financial wellness part of the everyday vernacular and move towards financial peace and abundance together!
Contact Stephanie here:
https://awkwardmoney.com/
https://www.instagram.com/awkmoney/
- ADHD and Autism Screeners: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1gCU9N2U0v7nvBgwbnmYPK6bP-RhX8xyi/view?usp=sharing
- ADHD Resource list: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1eFUMWG4H_4cYR8sg_j2PbHPnHqGs5owU/view?usp=sharing
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The Dr. Sev Talks Money podcast’s mission is to empower women to approach money confidently, reframe their financial habits, and build a future where their money is a tool for opportunity and security.
Through Dr. Sev Talks Money YouTube channel and Podcast, I provide actionable advice and inspiration to help you achieve financial freedom. Join me for one-on-one coaching, group sessions, workshops, or speaking engagements as we journey to financial empowerment together.
It’s never too late to begin again—let’s make it happen!
Here is one way you can support the podcast and YouTube channel: https://www.buymeacoffee.com/DrSevTalksMoney
My website: http://www.sevtalksmoney.com
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/DrSeverineBryan–SevTalksMoney
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/severinebryan/
Keywords
Financial trauma, mindset blocks, financial education, financial therapy, money habits, financial wellness, scarcity mindset, financial confidence, budgeting, impulse spending, ADHD and money, financial anxiety, trauma-informed coaching, cultural context in finance, self-compassion, financial guilt, avoidance in finance, financial resilience, financial safety, personalized financial wellness, generational financial trauma, financial legacy, overcoming financial shame, financial support systems, emotional triggers about money, financial coaching, financial therapy for communities of color, adultification of children, financial self-care, managing money confidently
Transcript
Dr. Sev:
Hey, hey, hey, Savvy Squad. Welcome to another episode of the Dr. Sev Talks Money, YouTube and podcast, where we empower women to manage money confidently and create a future of financial freedom, security, and opportunity. Today, I’m thrilled to introduce Stephanie Olano, a certified financial therapist, licensed marriage and family therapist, and CEO of Awkward Money. Stephanie specializes in addressing financial trauma and mindset blocks, particularly in Latinx and communities of color, by merging trauma informed coaching with. With financial education to help clients build resilience and healthier money habits. Stephanie, welcome to the Dr.Sev talks money podcast.
Stephanie Olano:
Yay. Thank you so much for having me on here. I’m really excited to be talking with you.
Dr. Sev:
So am I really excited to dive into this, because this is not a subject with which I am an expert, and so I like to bring experts on to dive into topics that. That I don’t. I may have a peripheral knowledge, but I want to get some deeper dives so my audience can understand about different things. And financial trauma is very important, and it’s not one of those that I am versed in. So right off, Stephanie, tell us a little bit about you and your business. Awkward money.
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah, so Awkward money. It started from an. It started from this notion that I know I’m smart enough to handle money. Like, I know I should know how to budget. I should know how to take care of my personal finances. But for some reason, there was just these. These mental blocks, these setbacks that I just couldn’t overcome. And during the time I was learning things like financial trauma and anxiety, it was starting to click in.
Stephanie Olano:
Like, wait, no wonder. No wonder I was struggling with the concepts or the practice or the habits that came with, you know, being good with your money. So it just. It just started evolving from there. And when I started to be more vulnerable and be more honest with the people in my community, I started to notice that we were all struggling. Like, it wasn’t just a me thing or a lack of knowledge thing. It was more like we were all in the same boat of I don’t know how to talk about money. And I get nervous anytime I look at those numbers.
Dr. Sev:
Yes. Oh, yes. We’re all in the same boat that you say that because none of us were born knowing about money. We. Sometimes we learn some things from different sources, from our parents, from movies, from friends, from family members. And sometimes some of those habits are not that good. But there is no reason to be ashamed, as you said, because we are all. We can all unlearn some things, and we can all learn the habits that will help us to, to. To develop financial wellness overall in our lives.
Stephanie Olano:
Exactly. Exactly. And it was just, again, connecting those dots of weight. It’s, it’s anxiety, it’s shame. It’s all the things that we as mental health therapists learn about, but we just never thought to apply it to money.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah. Yes. What are some of the most common financial traumas you encounter in your practice, and how do you guide clients through overcoming them?
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah, I find that if someone grew up in an environment or in a household where money scarcity was involved, like maybe someone just. I, I live in the Bay Area, so it’s very easy to find a lot of folks who grew up in that environment. So if you could have parents or family member. Family members that have multiple jobs, but they live in an environment that the rent is too high, groceries are really expensive, and it just takes a lot to have a livable wage. Right. So I started to see, like, okay, it’s not just that you’re. It’s, it’s not a matter of. That you’re irresponsible.
Stephanie Olano:
It’s more just you’re underemployed and you’re living in an area that’s very expensive, and we need to, we need to have real talks about that. But the way that certain, certain literature phrases it, it’s like you’re dumb for being this poor or you’re. You’re the one that didn’t get a job that make. Has. You make more money. And it’s just like what. Those types of conversations is like a, A no starter for a lot of folks. So.
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. But again, like, people kind of internalize those messages and that leads to that shame and that, that trauma that we’ve been talking about so far.
Dr. Sev:
Yes. So many people blame us for situations that are beyond our control and because they didn’t experience it the way we did and we’re. And the way we’re explaining it. It means we wrong. We’re wrong because that happened to me or that happened to my cousin. But that’s not, they didn’t experience that. They didn’t end up having to stay with a relative. So something is wrong with you for doing that.
Dr. Sev:
And that is so very wrong. Yes. So. And you talked about some of the things that they may encounter. Can you walk us through some, through how trauma informed coaching differs from traditional financial coaching?
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. And this is not a diss for traditional financial coaching. I have an accountant, I’ve worked with, my own financial coach. They can be very helpful and having you understand what, what the hell is going on. Right. And at least give you fill in those knowledge gaps that we all have about just finances in general. Because again, it’s, it’s not taught to us in school, so we have to go hunting for that knowledge ourselves. But I just found that again, having my own conversations, having, you know, asking the hard questions of why, why isn’t meeting an accountant enough for you? Why when the coach gives you these assignments, you’re not able to complete them? Like, what is happening there? I found that all of the conversations were leading to, of, oh, there’s like emotional and psychological things that you’re not able to bring up with this professional.
Stephanie Olano:
There are experiences that you haven’t even touched with your therapist because they probably don’t even know how to have those conversations with you. So unlike traditional financial coaching, which again, it focuses on the financial goals, it’s giving you examples on how to cut expenses. Trauma informed coaching is really recognizing like, okay, you need to find safety. We need to have conversations about self compassion and we probably need to bring in things like cultural context because there are just things there that definitely do influence finances.
Dr. Sev:
Yes. Because financial coaching tends to focus on the numbers, tend to focus on, okay, let’s help you with your budgeting. Let’s help you make sure you don’t overspend. But the crux of the matter is why are you overspending? If we can understand that, then we can help you not overspend. So that’s why it is so important, I think, for financial therapists and financial, regular financial coaches to work together with their clients to make sure they complete the entire picture around the person’s financial, you know, their financial life, so to speak. Yes. So let’s jump into a little bit of ADHD and financial health. How, in your opinion, how does ADHD influence behaviors like impulse spending?
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. So what we, what we need to understand about adhd, it’s not just like, oh, I’m just not able to focus. It’s not that it’s something more than that of you have an executive function disorder. And with that, there is much difficulty in controlling things like spending. It gets difficult to control your impulsivity. You’re always looking for things like dopamine or things to kind of regulate your nervous system. And if we’re not able to find that, guess what, like spending or maybe buying a. Maybe going on a shopping spree or engaging in retail therapy.
Stephanie Olano:
Those are things that the brain and the nervous system seek out to find that safety and comfort that we’re talking about. And the example I like to give with adhd, again, it’s not a matter of just lack of focus. We have to visualize that in our brain is like this conductor. And the conductor is trying to manage and, you know, give suggestions to the musicians that are. That are like our brain function. And when the conductor hears someone coughing, of course it’s going to lose focus. Or if there’s something wrong with the lighting in the orchestra hall, of course it’s like the conductor is just going to be like, I can’t do this. I can’t even read the music.
Stephanie Olano:
So it’s not that the musicians are really at fault, which is the brain. It’s more like the conductor’s really having issues and needs more supports. Maybe we need to find those accommodations that can help better, get a better outcome for that conductor. Right. But when it comes to things like spending, that conductor is like, you know what? I’m so overwhelmed. I don’t know what’s going on. I’m just going to go to 711 and just get my special treat and just call it a day, you know, But a lot of people have certain judgments when people do that, you know, and if it’s not 711 for a treat, it’s like, I’m going to spend $500 or $5,000 at Target, and that’ll help regulate my nervous system.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah, Yeah. I love that, that analogy that you used, because I think everyone can relate to that. And I just wish sometimes we were not. We were not living in such a judgmental world because we don’t honor difference. We don’t honor anything that doesn’t look like me, doesn’t act like me, doesn’t talk like me, doesn’t walk like me. Something has got to be wrong with that thing. And if we can learn how to understand that, just because someone reacts to something differently or behaves differently doesn’t mean that Something is wrong with them. But how can we accommodate that difference so that they can still function 100, just like I’m functioning, Because we’re all, to me, we’re all different in some way.
Dr. Sev:
We’re all different. And if we can be more lenient and be more accommodating, I think that will be very helpful. Because my daughter, I know, has ADHD and I am a type A order, write everything down, regimented. And she is just, you know, go with the flow, that kind of thing. And I had to learn to stop saying, why haven’t you done your homework? Why didn’t you do this? I had to learn to understand that she will get to things in her time, not in my timeline. And she’s not going to handle things the way I would, where I have five different accounts and all of that. She just wants one so she can learn how to manage that. And when she manages that one, then she goes to the next one, possibly, or just stays with one.
Dr. Sev:
Nothing is wrong with that. And I had to learn how to accommodate that. And I think if people can learn how to do that with family members, with spouses, with friends, the world would be so much better.
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. And I think this is where, again, that cultural con context needs to come in because your daughter is a, is a woman, woman of color. Like, there are different standards for us. I’m, I’m, I’m Latinx. And I know for a fact, like, my family was hard on me to go after my academic achievements. That’s why I have so many, like, certifications. It just, it just never left me because the world is going to look at me slightly different. Different if I am kind of loafing around or it does seem like I’m lazy or taking the easy route in any way, because there are just different standards.
Stephanie Olano:
And that started at a very young age. Like when I learned about the concept of adultification of children. I started to realize, like, oh, that’s why starting around middle school, I had to get everything organized because at that age, a lot of my friends, a lot of people I knew, people started to look at us a little differently. Right. And it was a matter of like, are you with the good kids or are you with the bad kids?
Dr. Sev:
Yes. Yes. Wow, that is so true. There are different standards in and, and in the Caribbean and Latin community, I think too, is this thing of education is what’s going to get you over the hump. If you’re educated, if you, the more you’re educated, you’re going to be okay. You’re going to be able to do what the things that you need to do. And that’s not necessarily tr. True.
Dr. Sev:
So we load up on certifications and educations and, but, you know, that necessary. That does not necessarily get us past the hump. But that doesn’t mean what we’re doing is wrong. It just, we just need to, we know how to maneuver based on expectations from family. And then how can we fit into the world with the world’s expectation and balance that with family’s expectation?
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. And there’s, there’s a concept called, like, third culture kids. So my family came to California from Central America in the 80s. So not only did, because I’m the first generation born in America, I had both the cultural expectations of my parents, which is Central American values with American values. And somewhere in the middle, I was able to create this hodgepodge of what me and my friends found important. But again, like kids of a certain age, like, they have to navigate almost three worlds, not just two, but three, you know, and in that it’s supposed to be an individual, but sometimes the individual values can be so conflicting to what the parents want and what your friends want and even what the school system wants that it just gets overwhelming. And when you add things like ADHD or scarcity or, you know, even things like food insecurity, like anything that comes with money, it’s going to unravel as we get to adulthood.
Dr. Sev:
Yes. Oh, my gosh, this is, this is such a good conversation. And this just leads me to my next question. How do mindset blocks manifest and what steps can someone take in addressing them?
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah, so it’s really, when I, when I say mindset blocks, it’s really this idea that, like, scarcity mindset, and this also, this avoidance starts to kick in. So whenever someone is wanting, let’s say like right now, it’s. We’re in the early days of tax season. Yes. Taxes are coming up in a few months, but we need to start organizing now. But someone could say, like, you know what? It’s, it’s a few weeks. Like, I can hold off on it. I don’t, I don’t need to schedule an appointment with my accountant.
Stephanie Olano:
I don’t need to get my receipts ready. I’m just, just going to deal with it later. Right? That’s that block. It’s like something in, in you is saying, like, don’t do this right now. It might be fear. It might be that, oh, maybe it’s imposter syndrome. It might be that you feel like you, you’re not worthy of getting your stuff organized. You’re not quite there yet.
Stephanie Olano:
So that’s where it’s like something internally is telling you, don’t do it, don’t do it. But it’s so contrary to what you really want. You want, if you’re a business owner, you have to get your taxes in order.
Dr. Sev:
Yes, I, I, I. So I can so associate myself with that because I find myself. And after digging and doing some research, I realize that there’s a fear of failure somewhere in the back of my head. And some. And the things that I procrastinate because people on the outside think and say to me all the time, man, you’re so accomplished, you’re doing this. You set your goals, you set them, you do them. But if they only knew that there are some things that easier for me to do. The hard things I don’t do as much because I know the hard things, what’s going to bring me the success.
Dr. Sev:
And for some reason I procrastinate. So, you know, all those things that we’re dealing with, the fear of failure and some of the other ones that you mentioned, and that is certainly compounded with having adhd.
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. So. And this is something else that people don’t know about ADHDers. There’s something called like the flow state. You know, we call it like hyper fixation, but basically it’s that sweet spot whenever we get into the minutiae of like a new concept or something that’s challenging and something that really excites us, like, we will stay in that state for as long as possible. It can be a beautiful thing. Like, I do my best work when I’m in that state, but I also forget to, like, eat or, you know, go, go stretch my body if I need it. Right.
Stephanie Olano:
So it could be like, you know, a dangerous thing. But, but when we’re in that flow state we have, we also understand that there’s if it’s like a, if it’s, if we’re on a scale, there’s something below that. That’s where stuff is just too easy. Like, there’s no dopamine there. I find it boring. And boring is like ADHD or worst Enemy. Like, I’m just not going to do it. Right.
Stephanie Olano:
But then there’s that line that’s like, it’s too challenging, it’s too hard. Or even if I believe it’s too hard, like, I just, I just can’t break through that surface. Right. So I’m always constantly battling between, like, how do I get Back in that flow state, I kind of know how to do the, the lower end stuff, but it’s just not engaging enough. And for some reason that, that higher state is just like, no, I got to walk away. I’m too scared to do it.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah, I think I need to get tested. I really do. Because what you explained about, you know, getting fixated on something, I will sit here and I look up at 2:00, at 3:00 in the morning and I’m like, wow. And I look up and it’s 2:00, 2:00pm Afternoon and I haven’t eaten because that thing that I am focused on, it’s, it revs me up. It just gets, I get so excited that I will sit here and work on it all night. And then the small things that really bring the big thing into focus, that gets dropped because it’s just, you know, it’s minutia. And those are the things I need to focus on to bring the whole picture together. So I think I really, I’ve been saying that, but I really need to get tested.
Dr. Sev:
I think because of the behaviors that I have learned and I really do think I have some semblance of adhd and I’m gonna make a bet to myself and to my audience that I will let you know I am going to try to get tested before the end of this quarter.
Stephanie Olano:
Okay. If you want, I’ll send you some free screeners and if, if you want, like I’ll. You can link them to your followers. Like, I think more people should at least be aware if it’s not adhd, maybe it’s something, maybe it’s something like anxiety or depression. Like that is really what the neurodiverse umbrella is really about. You know, it’s not just ADHD or autism. It’s this whole plethora of like, your brain just doesn’t function like a neurotypical’s brain or it just functions differently because maybe your nervous system is, it gets dysregulated a little more easier. You should be able to know that.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah. Yes, I agree. And maybe that will push me to do the things that I’ve been pushing, putting off that I need in 2025 to, to complete all the goals that I have. This, this is good. This is really good. And I hope that whoever’s listening to us, if you are in the same place as I am, that you will do those tests. And I’m going to make sure to follow up with Stephanie to get those tests so we can put, we can Attach it into the YouTube channel and then also into the podcast platform. So you can do your own test and follow up with your doctors and even with.
Dr. Sev:
With Stephanie and, And get some service to make sure that you are on the right track. Because the more help that we get and the more we can understand ourselves and our brains and how we function and why we do the things we do, I think the more successful we’ll become. Yeah. So. So let’s talk about building resilience. What role does that play in. In financial health? And how can someone cultivate that?
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. So I’m of two minds with resiliency. I love the fact that especially for Latinx bipoc women, like, we’re. We’re all about, like, we need to dig deep, you know, get that grit, get. Find a weight out of this problem or we’ll find the solutions. Right. We will do this by creating an action plan. We will, you know, reach out to our community.
Stephanie Olano:
We will make a plan to stay consistent with, with our goals and whatever progress we want to make. Like, we, we can be very powerful in that, but also with resiliency. And I’m sorry to say, but it is a trauma response. It is something that we used and it’s something that was built into us because we probably come from a background or environment where we had to have resiliency. We had to, because no one else was there to guide us or teach us. Like, this is a way to solve this problem.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah, Right.
Stephanie Olano:
Because without it, we wouldn’t have been able to adapt, let alone cope with whatever traumatic event we had. And maintaining this, this. The stability that comes with having, you know, psychological functioning or experiencing adversity. Like, resiliency was born out of that, you know, so although it. I do consider resiliency a superpower, we also have to understand, like, it does come from a place that can be very dark and has some negative effects in our community. And we just need to be aware, like, if we’re leaning on resiliency most of the day, we’re going to lead into things like burnout, depression, anxiety, or all the other psychological issues that we’re trained to help heal from.
Dr. Sev:
Yes. Yes. Wow. This is great. I’m loving it. So talk a little bit more about personalized financial wellness. What goes into creating a personalized financial wellness plan? I’m sure this is not. Again, we’re not giving.
Dr. Sev:
We’re not giving advice here. This is more educational. So this, what Stephanie’s going to be sharing, is not comprehensive. It’s not geared towards, you as you’re listening, speak to your own financial personnel, your own financial therapist to get the answer that relates to you. So again, Stephanie, what goes into creating a personalized financial wellness plan?
Stephanie Olano:
I think whatever gets you to the point of you have a sense of control, you feel secure, and you feel really aligned with your financial journey. I want people to understand this is your financial journey. If someone is just telling you, like, this is all you have to do, and it’s. For some reason, it just. You feel like the system doesn’t work for you. You feel like this plan is not really, like, made for you. It probably wasn’t. It’s probably a very generic financial plan.
Stephanie Olano:
You should be able to talk with this person that you’re working with and say, can I have some involvement in this? Can I have a say? Because this is just not going to work with me, you know, and especially if you’re an adhd, if you have an ADHD brain, you have a right to say, like, okay, like this, this might work for you, but I don’t think it’s going to work for me, you know, and I, I always encourage that for my clients. I want them to be able to advocate for themselves with that, though. We have to be honest. We have to be honest with your financial needs. Like, what do the numbers say and what are the. Your money stories? You know, what are these experiences? Whether it’s your family dynamics, your personal experience, you know, the things that you possibly don’t want to share with folks, but you have to, you have to start unraveling that, unpacking that with the person that you’re talking to. Yeah. Because in there you can start to realize, like, oh, I have emotional triggers about money.
Stephanie Olano:
I have a fear of things like scarcity, or I seem to overspend because I’m feeling guilty. Those are the things that come with unraveling your money story. Yeah.
Dr. Sev:
And we all deserve financial peace. We all deserve a place of financial safety. And so, you know, it behooves us to try to get beyond the barriers in working with someone like Stephanie will help us get beyond the barriers so that we’re not living in a constant state of financial trauma. Because when we don’t address those things, we’re going to end up just repeating cycles and repeating cycles and never get out of it. So when we work with someone like Stephanie, who can help us uncover the why and, and the how and, and. And get us to a place where we, where our minds are open, open to discuss the things that are blocking us and the Things that can help us move forward. And then we work with someone like me who work with the numbers, then together we’re going to help you the best we can to get to where you need to get to. Because again, we believe in you and we believe that you deserve financial peace.
Dr. Sev:
We believe that you deserve to walk in a financial abundance, whatever that means for you. Because financial abundance doesn’t necessarily mean you’re going to have a million dollars if that’s not what it means for you. So whatever that means for you, we want to make sure that you are walking in financial wellness and financial abundance. So please follow Stephanie. I’m going to be sharing in a little bit all the places that you can follow her. And also in the show notes and in, in the podcast and on YouTube, we’re going to be sharing her website and all the things where you can follow her. So Stephanie, we, we touched a little bit on generational financial trauma. What, what advice or what would you say to someone who are always wanting to break the cycle of financial trauma, generational financial trauma and create a positive financial legacy?
Stephanie Olano:
I think for that we need to start with the awareness. We need to start that there are some generational cycles here that you’re trying to break without that, like it’s, again, it’s an, it’s a, it’s a no starter.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah.
Stephanie Olano:
You know, and if we’re not aware of like why, why we have this cycle, why we even have this rule around money, why we even talk about money this way, any type of financial coaching or therapy is just not going to work.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah, right.
Stephanie Olano:
We need to start connecting the dots. But what I also want people to understand is there’s probably going to be some really interesting feelings that come out of that and that might add to the guilt and shame. I want people to understand you can allow yourself to be self compassionate, you can show yourself that grace because that’s what should have been happening from gate. But unfortunately living in this part of the world where, you know, we, we live in a capitalist society, it, we have these messages of like, oh, you’re poor because you’re not good with money. Like it’s just an absolutist. Like that is, that is all we get, you know, but there are other factors, there are other things at play here. So with that we need to, if the world or certain people are not going to show us that compassion, we have to do that for ourselves.
Dr. Sev:
Yes, yes. And I’m glad you said that about self compassion and we have to learn to forgive ourselves because we don’t know what we don’t know. And, and judge yourself by yourself, not what somebody else says you should be. And this is why I absolutely detest those. By 20, you should be. By 30, you should be. I just absolutely detest that. And in order to retire, you must have over a million dollars and all of those markers.
Dr. Sev:
Not everybody needs that because there are people who are retired with just, you know, five figure in your account. But they, they, maybe they’re well off, they live with family, maybe their house is paid off. You know, there’s so many factors that go into that. And these absolute, the, you know, these absolutes that we put out in these financial articles and then people look at that and they give up because I’ll never get there. And, and I really hate those. So I’m glad you said that. We really need to give ourselves compassion. Forgive ourselves for what we don’t know.
Dr. Sev:
If you, if your parents didn’t know, they can’t teach you. So forgive your parents. Forgive you yourself. Okay, Stephanie, you have a few programs that I’d love for you to share with us and how they can benefit your audience and anybody else who they think they’re listening and you’re thinking, oh, that would be perfect for my nephew. How they can learn about the programs, what the programs entail.
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. So the first tier of offerings I offer is called the Money Safety Plan. That’s just a two, probably two and a half hour session where I meet with the person and we go through this whole laundry list of what are your money values? How do we get you to a place of safety anytime you do your finances? What are the setbacks, you know, that you are not able to do your finances on your own? How do we get you to a place where if you are dysregulated, who can you call? What can you turn to, to self soothe and really get you to a place of. This thing doesn’t have to control me. I could actually find a place where I have that financial confidence, like I’m able to do this. And we’re moving away from this idea that finances is, is boring. It’s overwhelming. It’s very scary to like you’re actually doing a financial self care practice.
Stephanie Olano:
And that’s really what I want for all my clients. Like they look at their finances as more of a practice. And with that you’re going to make mistakes.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah. Wow. And, and the thing is, here’s the thing. It’s okay to make mistakes. I think we, again, as you talk about living in the Society that is so intolerant of, of mistakes, like, you know, we should be walking on, on air or the sea or whatever, you know, not making any mistakes. And if we can learn how to embrace our mistakes, say this happened, what can I do next? When I was much younger, I was so hard on myself when, when I made mistakes because, because of the expect familial expectations. I was just so hard on myself because I, I had this high expectation because my family had high expectations. And I didn’t realize I was harming myself by trying to do things in a way that even didn’t serve me, didn’t serve my personality because I thought I had to measure up.
Dr. Sev:
So if this is you and you’re listening, just know, measure yourself against yourself and not try to try, try your best. I know I’m saying this and it’s a little bit hard because especially if you’ve been practicing this for years and years, it’s going to be a little bit difficult to unravel. So we’re not saying what we’re saying here for you to think, oh, it’s just going to, we’re going to meet with a therapist, we’re going to meet with this person and everything is going to be fine. No, there you will have struggles, you will have times when you revert to that other person that you don’t want to be. And that is perfectly okay. Wherever you are in the process, celebrate where you are in the process, do the work that you need to do where you are in the process and keep moving forward. So I hope this is encouraging. Someone, is there any other program that you would like to share with us? Stephanie?
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah, so I definitely offer one on one sessions. They all vary between the time frame. So I have a three month program, six month program, and then a one year. The one year is definitely for the person who’s like, I need more handholding, I need all the things that you have to offer. I just need more accountability. And I just, I just need a year to get all of that together.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah. You know, awesome.
Stephanie Olano:
And I, and I also offer speaking gigs for colleges and people in the community. I also do them online if people, you know, different companies from different states want to have me. Like, I want to get, I want to have financial trauma and anxiety be an everyday term.
Dr. Sev:
Yeah, Yeah. I always say discussing personal finance, it should be like going to the movie and coming out and talking about that movie. That’s how commonplace it needs to be. Because we all manage money, we all handle money. So why are we create you know, creating shame around it. Why do we have shame around it? Why do we have all these stigmas attached to money when really money is neutral? Money is emotionally neutral itself. Money itself is emotionally neutral. It’s the things we assign to money that creates the issue.
Dr. Sev:
And if we can talk about it, and the more we talk about it, the better we feel. It’s like, you know, coming off that relationship, that guy hurt us, that lady girl hurt us. And we talk to our friend and the more we talk to them, the better we start feeling because it’s not even that we, we want them to solve our problem. We just want to try to, to walk our way through it. And that’s what a financial therapist will help you do. As he or she walk you through these things, you’re going to find the solutions that you need because they’re not there to tell you you need to do this and you need to do that next. No, they’re going to meet you where you are and, and help you walk you through where you need to be based on your goals. They’re not going to say this is where you need to be.
Dr. Sev:
What is it that you are desiring? And they’re going to help you create a roadmap to get there.
Stephanie Olano:
Yes. Yes.
Dr. Sev:
Okay. Anything else that you want to share, Stephanie?
Stephanie Olano:
Just that you are more than just your bank account balance. Like your self worth is not based on the amount that’s in there. And if someone has told you otherwise, then I’m sorry to say that they were wrong. You know, and it’s so unfortunate you. You internalize that message or you’ve heard that message repeated. You know, you are a human being and you deserve dignity and respect.
Dr. Sev:
Yes. I know we said we’re going to have Stephanie’s contact information in the show notes, but Stephanie share the best place for them to contact you. Maybe your website or so so that somebody who’s listening and, and driving may be able to hear that.
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah. So for my financial trauma coaching, you can definitely find me on Instagram @oc money. That’s spelled a w k money. For my private practice where I provide financial therapy and ADHD assessments. You can find me at the handle dodostherapy that’s spelled to do with an S therapy and I practice in the state of California, but I do provide virtual sessions.
Dr. Sev:
Okay. Awesome. Stephanie, this has been such a pleasure and so enlightening to walk through this with you. And who knows, we may be able to come back. Have you come back another time when the schedule opens? Up because this is really something that we need to talk about and that people need to hear. And sometimes hearing it over and over from different avenues will help people to understand, to ditch the shame and not allow anybody to shame you. Because there’s not one person on this earth who’s never made a mistake. There’s not one person on this earth who’s never made a money mistake.
Dr. Sev:
And so I want people to hear that and know that you are valued, you deserve the best. And we are here and passionate about what we do because we believe in you and that you deserve the very best. So as we wrap up, please follow us. I said Stephanie’s information she just shared. The podcast is going to be on my website at sev talks money.com that’s S E V talks money.com is going to be on my YouTube, which is at Dr. Sev Talks Money. Dr. S E V Sev Talks T A L K S Money.
Dr. Sev:
And it’s also going to be on all of your favorite podcast platform. So please look out for that. And Stephanie, it has been an absolute pleasure and I hope to to speak with you in some other time.
Stephanie Olano:
Yeah, thanks for having me. I really appreciate this time. And let’s make financial trauma and anxiety part of the vernacular. Yes, I think we’re going to do it.
Dr. Sev:
Yes, we are. We are.
